Real vs. Fake Friends.

" A friend is someone who is there for you when he would rather be anywhere else"

So I have been really irritated lately about whether or not I have any friends out here in California. I am really tired of listening to others, giving them advice, being there for them and what do I get in return...... Nothing! Anytime there is something that is important to me it seems that I get blown off! I am just in shock at how others can treat people sometimes and well frankly Im tired of it.
I feel like I am a good person and I have alot to give to others but it seems most of the time someone is either insinuating that I am getting on their nerves and if that isn't happening then people are ignoring me. I don't know maybe I am being selfish.... but I feel like I am far from that and I try to respect others and I don't get that back in return. I think I won't even try being friends with the people who don't make the effort to be mine in return. I swear I went home and had so much fun because I actually felt like the people that hung out with me truly loved and cared about my well being. I know that maybe sometimes I am overbearing or I talk a lot but I know everyone else has flaws too. I don't need people in my life to make me feel less valuable just because I am who I am. I don't know if its California or what but the people out here are way different and definitely not as compassionate or caring. To me this will never truly be home!

Ups and Downs.... When is this ride over and when can I get off?

Lately with my husband and I things have been a rollcoaster ride. I dont know what the deal is when he is up, Im down and when Im up, he is down. I don't know if it is just the stress of knowing he is coming home on both our parts but it just seems like lately we are in the wrong direction.
I honestly cannot stand to argue or be on the wrong page and I really wish we could get on the right page. I just have alot of fear about him coming home and anyone who says its not scary is crazy because it is after 7 months of not being with someone. Most likely things will go back to the way they were before but there is a possibility that both of you have grown and not grown together.
Lately I have been wanting to start a family more than anything in the whole world but that is definitely going to have to be put on hold if we don't get to where we need to be. I think working on us comes first and a family will be second. I can only hope my fears melt away and things are good when he gets home cuz right now im wondering when will the ride end and can I please get off.... cuz I have had enough!