The wonderful world of exercise....

So I am trying my hand at really attempting to stick to exercise... I have done this and said I was going to keep doing it a thousand times but I really mean it. I want to be thin like I used to be. I want to be healthy and it feels good to exercise. So I have been doing Pilates. I know " how hard could that be right?" Well I come out of there sweating so it must be hard. Not to mention my abs feel like someone stomped on them for about an hour or two straight. Pilates is a really great exercise. I suggest to anyone who wants to tone up!

My First Cry.....

So tonight I had my first cry because my husband is gone. I checked out another girls blog and she had a lot of deployment songs. ( Thanks Jen jk) It just really got me thinking about how much I take for granted when he is here. I mean something as simple as getting a bowl out of the cabinet is a task for me. We did everything together and he was pretty much my best friend. Ya we drove each other crazy but isn't that how things are when someone becomes your family sometimes. I cherish everyday that I am married. So many people have it rough and coming from a broken home myself I value what to love someone really means. I think it means giving when you cant give anymore, telling that person you love them daily, doing something nice for them when they least expect it, and trying your best to realize that you should wake up each day asking yourself what you can do to make that other person happy. Loving someone is hard.... no one says its supposed to be easy. You have to love that person on good days and bad and let them know when they are being a " jerk" whether they want to hear it or not. Love is about honestly, loyalty, compassion, understanding, and most importantly respect. I know my relationship is not perfect and neither is my husband....... but all that matters is he is perfect for me.

A Good Friend.....

This has been a topic that I have thought about for a long time and it comes up as a topic of many conversations.... so what does it take to be a good friend.

I found this online and I thought this was well written...

A Good Friend
In kindergarten your idea of a good friend was the person who let you have the red crayon when all that was left was the ugly black one.

In primary school your idea of a good friend was the person who went to the bathroom with you; held your hand as you walked through the scary halls; helped you stand up to the class bully; shared their lunch with you when you forgot yours on the bus; saved a seat on the back of the bus for you; knew who you had a crush on and never understood why.

In secondary school your idea of a good friend was the person who let you copy their social studies homework; went to that "cool" party with you so you wouldn't wind up being the only freshie there; did not let you lunch alone.

In high school your idea of a good friend was the person who gave you rides in their new car; convinced your parents that you shouldn't be grounded; consoled you when you broke up with Nick or Susan; found you a date to the prom or went to the prom with you (both without dates); helped you pick a university and assured you that you would get into that university; helped you deal with your parents who were having a hard time letting you go.

On the threshold of adulthood your idea of a good friend was the person who was there when you just couldn't deal with your parents; assured you that now that you and Nick or you and Susan were back together, you could make it through anything; just silently hugged you as you looked through blurry eyes at 18 years of memories; and reassured you that you would make it in university as well as you had these past 18 years; and most importantly sent you off to university knowing you were loved.

Now, your idea of a good friend is still the person who gives you the better of the two choices, hold your hand when you're scared, helps you fight off those who try to take advantage of you, thinks of you at times when you are not there, reminds you of what you have forgotten, helps you put the past behind you but understands when you need to hold on to it a little longer, stays with you so that you have confidence, goes out of their way to make time for you, helps you clear up your mistakes, helps you deal with pressure from others, smiles for you when they are sad, helps you become a better person, and most importantly loves you!
Those of you who have been this to me thank you for being such a great friend. I don't know where I would be without you.
No matter where we go or who we become, never forget who helped us get there.
There's never a wrong time to pick up a phone or send a message telling your friends how much you miss them or how much you love them

Deployment Suck....

So..... I have been able to talk to my husband a total of like 4 times and he has been gone for a week and a half. Deployments never get any easier. I don't think it matters if you have went through it 1 time or 5 times it doesn't seem to make a difference the toll it takes on your relationship.
My husband and I somehow really manage to get along for the most part while he is deployed and it makes me feel like our relationship is really strong and can stand the test of time. I am open to his freedom to hang with friends and see things. I do give him crap about it but hey that is my job as a wife I think! :) I don't really mind that he does things to keep him occupied as long as it isn't anything inappropriate. I think we all know what I mean by that and I completely 100 percent trust that he would NEVER do anything of that sort. I know that I have to keep myself busy and with this new job and the fact that I want to really be committed to losing weight hopefully the time flies by. I guess my mom will probably be out to visit me around my birthday and I think that will be great to show her what its like to live in California and what my life is really like.
I wish a lot of times that my husband and I can bond together as close as we do at home as when he is on deployment. It seems that the transition to home is really hard and getting used to each other and not forgetting how important we are supposed to be to one another gets forgotten once he returns. It seems that we get on each other's nerves a lot more. I mean I don't doubt our love for one another for an instant but I hope that when this deployment comes to an end we can adjust and work on making our relationship just as strong at home as it is when he is away!

Just the right moment......

Life is the sum of all your choices. ~Albert Camus

I watched the movie " The curious case of Benjamin Button" last night and I got to thinking about how things happen in our lives. I mean just think if you chose one different path just one different choice you might not be where you are today. For example if I would have called in sick at my job the night my "future husband" was at the bar that I work at I might never have met him.
Its wierd to think how just once choice could have changed your life in a drastic way. Don't you think its interesting that the choices we make pretty much lead us to how our lives turn out. We have choices presented to us daily that change us and it really puts things in reality.

I guess my husband was there at the right moment in time and I was there at the right moment. Do you ever wonder " What would my life be if I had made different choices?" I wonder for a minute but then I think I wouldn't be living the wonderful life I am today.

I love my husband and I love my life. Sure it might not be perfect but whats what makes things great. I have had my struggles and honestly most of them are within myself. I think that in life we have to figure out what makes us happy and then the rest all falls into place. I would just like to thank God for giving me choices and allowing me to choose my fate.

Taking a Look Back 2008

Going home from the Holidays this year was a wonderful moment. We got to meet our new nephew baby Caden and see all of our family and friends. It was right before Scott left so it was a really nice time to be home for the holidays. The moral of this blog is 2008 held a lot of memories. I know I left a lot out but I had to choose the ones I felt were most important. I can only hope 2009 is just as great!

Another highlight of 2008 was when we headed out to California. From Illinois it was a 30 hour trip and ridiculously long but the most important thing is we did it together. I saw it as like an adventure in the beginning of our marriage and we had to stick it out together. Well needless to say we made it! I had never been here before in my life so it was definitely a change of pace for me but overall I do think it is beautiful.

How could April 12, 2008 not be memorable. That is the day that I married my best friend of 5 years and it was perfect. I mean everything was just perfect. The ceremony and the decorations and everyone coming to celebrate our day with us. I felt really good that day and now all I have is memories through photo and video. I hope someday Scott and I can renew our vows and have another little wedding. Maybe on a beach somewhere.

The next pictures are just random pictures of Scott and his family going out after his homecoming. Listen people at this point I had only seen my future husband about 13 times for the whole year of 2007 so when February of 2008 came and it was his homecoming I was so excited.

ok these first pictures are my Bachelorette Party in March of 08. It comes with a hilarious story or maybe you just had to have been there. We had a great time that night. All of us girls went to downtown St Louis Mo on the Landing. We first ate at Vito's which is an awesome italian/sicilian pizza places that is super classy and then we decided to head out to the bar. Well we we ended up going to this dance club called Morgan Street and hey probably having a few to many cocktails but it was my bachelorette party so that is acceptable. Well my friend Afton was so drunk that back at the hotel room ( we stayed in the Millenium by the way) she was looking all around saying " I can't find my feet, I cant find my feet" Ha She was looking for her SHOES! In her drunkenness she kept saying that because she was going to keep drinking.

Well none of us could hang but one girl decided to keep Afton company... so I guess a bottle of wine and to the wee hours of the morning later we get a knock on our door and I wake up realizing our hotel door is wide open and the manager is standing there. He says Ladies I believe that there is a lady of yours on the 19th floor who is in the hallway and has thrown up all over herself. The manager stated " she apparantly couldn't find the 17th floor" My friend ( ha ha) had gotten so drunk she couldn't find the floor we were on and boy was it a mess but a funny one!

6 qualities he loves about me....

Ok so I was telling my husband about my blog and I told him from time to time that I would be asking him questions concerning the blog to get it going and to have creative ideas for posts. So.... I asked him What are 6 qualities he loves about me? God love him he really tried for about 4 of them and then he was struggling. He said : You are beautiful, calm, caring, dependable, and have niceboobies. What?? You were doing so good until you had to mention my boobies! I mean I love that you like them and all but honestly I was hoping to have 6 good qualities that didn't involve a body part. It makes me miss him even more when he says such silly things.

Not to mention I said niceboobies huh. Because we were talking online and he says " Yeah one word." He is so cute sometimes I just want to squeeze him. I was proud of him for doing well though considering he didnt use a derogatory statement until the 5th quality. I love you honey! :)

Addictions and the Elderly

Well I finally decided to leave the world of addictions ladies and gentleman. I was tired of dealing with very ungrateful people. Have you ever met someone with an addiction? Oh wow are they not fun to counsel. No offense to anyone who likes drugs! LOL. I just couldn't hang anymore.

So I was blessed enough to find a new job working for a place called Oxnard Family Circle. It is an adult day health care and I have been there 3 days and love it more than the 2 years I put in working with addicts. I am basically working with mentally challenged and elderly adults who come to hang out for the day and have fun.

An example of my work day:

We went on an outing for 3 hours the other day and took the elderly on a trip to the Ventura County Visitors Center where we looked around and then sat on the picnic tables and ate Subway and then back to the Center we go.
They have Bingo/ Dance Parties/ Arts and Crafts and all kinds of things for the elderly. Have you ever seen a little old woman or man break it down? Well let me say it makes your heart melt.

Needless to say the environment is way different and how could it not make your life better to make the elderly happy by being there for them and saying good morning!

Be a better person..... do something that is rewarding in life.

About Me.....

Ok so this is a new thing that I am trying and I am not really sure what I am doing but I thought it would be a great idea to post how I am feeling, what is new in my life, and basically a little bit about me as a person.
Let me first talk a little bit about the reason why I chose to do a blog. I was thinking since I live so far away wouldn't it be nice to create something where people could see whats going on with me and really get to know me better. I instantly thought I would want something that I could post pictures, poetry, thoughts, and updates of how my life is going in great detail instead of just a very vague description of me.
Well since the title is a little about me I guess I will do a little post about myself/ Feel free to post questions to me of things you would like to know if I leave anything out :

All About Me:

whats your full name: Amber Rae Murray ( my maiden name is Monroe)
how old are you? I am 26 soon to be 27
whats your starsign? I am a gemini ( You know what that means: I have two sides to me or so they say)
whats your hair colour? I have multi-colored hair.
whats your eye colour? Brown
Job: I work as a social worker for the elderly.
Where do I reside: South Of La California
have you ever been in love? A few times but Im married now so I found the love of my life.
how long was your last relationship? My relationship now has been about 6 years. Wow time flies
Ever cried over a girl/boy? Oh what a dumb question havent we all.
are you missing someone? Yes my husband who is deployed for over half of this year 09.
do you drink? Yes occasionally
Ever been so drunk you dont remember all the night? Only once and it was scary and hasn't happened since.
Ever tried drugs? Nope and proud to say I haven't.
What scares you? Honestly I am not scared of much but maybe just losing someone I love dearly.
Do you believe in fate? Yes but I think it only takes you so far and if you mess it up then that is your loss.
Do you believe in karma? Yup What comes around Goes around.
whats your favourite film? Probably " the Notebook " ( I am a sucker for love)
What books are you reading? I am totally obssessed with Vampire books ever since the Twilight Series ( got to love unresolved sexual tension)
Dogs or cats? Doggies I love my Tobie and Trinity.
What cant you live without? Love/ Happiness/ or Peace
Any piercings? Yes 6 mostly my ears
Any tattoos? No but I Plan on getting one while my husband is deployed.
What attracts you too the opposite sex? I think their eyes and their personality.
Who did you last kiss? My husband.... goodbye.
Whats the last song you listened too? My Life by the Game ( great song good meaning)
What turns you off? Liars and Cheaters
What did you want to be as a kid? Don't laugh I wanted to be a model.

Celebrity look-alikes? I have heard 3: Drew Barrymore, Alecia Sylverstone, and Nicole Richie
Country you'd most like to visit? Guam ( thats where my husband is.)
Last book you bought? Sookie Stackhouse Series
Favourite cuisine? Pasta and Baked Chicken
Weaknesses? I need to be more self motivated in certain areas of my life.
What inspires you? I know it sounds crazy but mean people inspire me to be a better person.
Favourite TV shows? American Idol, The Bachelor, Army Wives, The Hills, Dr Phil
Pet peeves? Immaturity and inability to communicate

Thats My first Blog. If there is anything else you would like to know let me know and I will try to add it to my blog. I need ideas for this so I will need people to help me out and comment!