Homecoming....

So homecoming is just right around the corner. Matter of fact, it should be a couple weeks from now and it just seems really surreal. I am so looking forward to my husband coming home but I am also not looking forward to the readjustment period where we have to get used to each other all over again. Its fun to date again and to sleep next to him again... but its not fun to argue over the tv; to have him telling me what I need to buy at the grocery store ( which is crap most of the time); to just be able to go instead of having to tell someone where Im going. It's just a huge adjustment but I am looking forward to having someone to cuddle with, someone to go out on dates with, and someone to come to home to after a long day at work.

This has been a long deployment and its hard.... most people dont understand how hard it is to be separated from the person you love for months at a time. I can only hope that all the growing we have done individually comes together and nourishes our relationship even more.

I miss my friend.... and its not too much longer he will be around all the time again.

Piece of Shit Dad

This is a little poem I would like to title :

" Piece of Shit Dad"

Well let me tell you a little story about my life;

I had a piece of shit father who always cheated on his wife.

I grew up to believe that you can't trust a soul;

and for the longest time; emptiness; in a heart that should be whole.

Lets go to my high school years when you cheated and your relationship was through

and we stood in my brothers room and my mother had to tell you to say " I love you"

Way to go pops what a great role model you are;

Having a secret life really got you far.

Oh how I remember those days when women used to call on the phone;

and I would tell them how you would never leave this family alone.

Or you would be on the internet promoting yourself on dating sites;

and mom would stay up many a restless night.

I am the only one who stood up for what was right;

I am not scared of you; you cannot control me; I always took on the fight.

I will never forget when you called your own daughter like her mom a bitch.

Well I think you are the lowest scum of the earth; asshole; how do you like the roles being switched?

I would talk about my family life and it would bring tears to my eyes;

All because of my so-called father's decietfulness and lies.

But then I stopped and realized what kind of power I was letting him have over me;

I let it all go and now I am free.

You don't even fucking know what it means to be a dad;

To me you have only been a sperm donor-- as a father you were that bad.

Oh but I hear you have a new family now arent you so glad?

I bet they don't know about family you let behind isn't that sad?

You will answer one day for all that you have done;

When you grow old and family you have none.

Even your new daughter will eventually see

and what nothing to do with you that I guarantee.

Fuck you dont ever again look my way;

Even if Im sorry is what you are going to say.

You know they always say " what comes around goes around"

Karma is a bitch you will get yours even if it doesn't happen until you are 6 feet in the ground.

I am confident you will be delivered to hell in a hand basket;

No one will be frowning only smiling the day they look at your casket.

This will be the time you will pay for you sins;

This war will be over finally the good will win.

I wrote you off a long time ago;

When I have children you will never see them grow.

I would not expose them to such a horrible, sad, pathetic man like you.

Who will one day pay for what he put others though.

It is you who has to live with all the wrongs you never made right;

and misery you will have in your life always; oh what a sight.

It makes me feel so happy to be finally free.

You are dead to me.

This is dedicated to the worst father in the world.... sorry its a little late pops I wasn't sure what to get you for Father's Day. I hope you like it.

How cute is that picture with his new daughter. What a great dad. I would have posted a picture with him and I for fathers Day but oh wait he wasn't ever there for me and I dont have any pictures together with him.

Homecoming.....

He finally got to come home and we had a blast. It went way to fast and he is already back in Guam but I was just so happy to have him around again. I told one of my friends after he left " I didn't realize how much he added fulfillment to my life until he was back here and then left me again" Here are some pictures of homecoming......

I love him so much....only a little bit longer in this deployment I can make it or so I keep telling myself because I don't have a choice.