Old Poems.... By Me

So I was looking through stuff and was thinking and decided to post a few old poems on here. This was for my college poetry class.

Manipulation

You are the evil that walks this earth

Spitting your game to women through verse.

You lie, cheat, are never wrong.

How did I believe, let you hurt me for so long.

I hear all the time women are the enemy,

then exactly why is it you go through so many?

You say we walk with our brains in our skirts,

always complaining we hurt you because we've been hurt.

Everyone know most men carry their brains in their pants,

Using smooth words and ways to romance.

To get in our skirts and make us hurt.

I should have been smarter, realized.

But its now too late, and you I despise.

I wont fall again my knees are sore.

I sold myself short call me a whore.

I loved, you knew took advantage

My heart now torn, mended with bandage.

I wish you the worst

As I write this verse

Fuck you dont ever look my way

Even if Im sorry is what you're gonna say.

Eventually people dont forget

They only start to regret

You were my biggest mistake

I was real you were fake.

Manipulation... the ability for someone a situation to skew.

My downfall... the manipulation of me by you.

Falling

Looking into those eyes

I fall.

Fall into the darkness until I eventually see the light.

Clock strikes two as I come back to earth, returning from you world.

Where we became one.

For a moment,

Our bodies entertwined like that of vines along trees.

Connecting spiritually as I feel

Your entire being, my world and yours

One

All worries cease to exist

As I fall into those eyes, you looking into mine.

Wondering " Is this how it feels?"

Everything real. Touching, caressing, softly.

Connecting over and over again.

Feeling our way to the depths of our souls,

Then release

One again with the world, but for a moment I felt it.

Love.

Well what do you know..... I think I was actually kind of good at this.... Ha its been a long time since I read them.

My Weight Loss Journey

This bottom pic is in December before I was working out much at all...... and the top pic is the most recent pic March 14, 2009 of this year!!!! After 2 1/2 months of gym time. Not sure I notice much of a difference.

So my goal is to lose 20 pounds before August! Of course that is when hubby is coming home. I have been working my butt off at the gym. I work out 3-4 days a week. I do both cardio and pilates. Sometimes I get so discouraged because I don't see the difference but my boss says she does... I know I will stick to it anyways because it is important to me even though I only sometimes enjoy working out. I make myself do it most of the time. Tell me do you see a difference. Here is my before pic and and after.... I dont notice much of a difference at all.

Love.......

I am sorry I havent posted in awhile. I get busy and then the first thing I start slacking on his my blog. I enjoy reading others so I can only hope people enjoy reading mine. I got good new yesterday!

My hubby is going to come home and see me probably around my birthday. He wanted to badly to suprise me but one thing about him is that he is horrible with suprises and when I start probing even a little about something exciting he has to go and say I ruined it but in all reality he is the one who cannot keep a secret! I miss him so much...

I have to say he has been so great lately. Since we are approaching on one year of marriage... I will tell the truth it has been hard. There have been times when I wasn't really sure we would make it through some of our disagreements but when it comes down to it I know we will. We love one another... and love is better and worse. Since he has been deployed I feel like we really have been appreciating each other more and we are forced to communicate alot on the phone and so it is really helping our relationship. I can only imagine how good things will be when he comes home for good.

I think sometimes when someone is around all the time you forget how much you take for granted when they are not around. I vow to try to never let those feelings subside and I hope he is able to do the same. I have faith that we will be great when he gets home and will continue to get through all the obstacles we are faced with.

I am so excited for my birthday!!! That is only two months from now and will be here before I know it.

I love my husband.

My new Addiction...

My newest addiction ladies and gentlemen is..... drum roll please Vampire books. What is it about these vampires books that just gets me going! I mean I literally am always on the edge of my seat in these books and so interested. I think maybe because its forbidden love and people don't approve and the chemistry between these humans and vampires is indescribable. It makes me all giddy inside. So I have read Twilight... that sparked it off! Then I decided to read PC/Kristen Cast Series and the new one comes out this month! I will get it! Now I am on to true blood now... which is a series of 8 books right now! I am only on number 3 and when I went to the book store I picked up an Anita Blake series! I swear I am an addict..... I wonder what is it is. Most people say its the unresolved sexual tension but in some of the books I am reading now they already do and I am still on the edge of my seat! Anyways.... it keeps me busy and interested while my husband is away so its good!

The Bachelor: Can I say Jerk!!!!!!

Ok.... so I just had to vent about the bachelor and this whole f#@@ed up situation. We all know men do things like this. Of course people have gotten engaged and broken up. Of course we know men have cheated and had feelings for someone else but seriously within 6 weeks all of the sudden things change? Wtf? Are you serious? You are just getting to know someone after a couple months of dating and here you sit and state " things changed and she was different" Of course things changed you arent going to New Zealand on these insanely absurd dates that no one in the real world could even afford and now that you are off camera things became REAL!!!! What an asshole. I am sorry people I was so pissed. I thought you were nice but ha.... you proved to be exactly the same way as every other man in the world that thinks with one thing only. You say you were still in love with Molly! Well have a little bit of respect for Melissa and at least go on the show and then break things off afterwards not on PUBLIC television. Melissa was right you are a BASTARd and poor Ty!!!!! He says he doesn't know .... kids are smart! You disgust me and every other man who has done something like this just disgusts me.